Lucky May

Lucky was found in the middle of the night, in a storm, on a dark rural road.  He was curled up, just a spot in the road.  I thought he was dead.   I don't know what made me stop, but I thank God that I did.  Over the years I would say I rescued him, but I would learn that it was him who rescued me.  He slept with me, ate with me, watched TV, and was a constant happy light in my life.  He loved cream cheese and milk!  He always wanted to see what I was eating.  He was protective, and loyal.  He was funny, a funny boy!  And he was so loving with constant head rubs, and just being by my side.  A constant source of pure, unconditional love.  I think in the end he knew his time to leave was near.  I could rarely get a picture of his face as he would turn his head.  About 2 weeks before he passed, he sat up in the chair.  I looked over and it was if he was posing, and saying take my picture.   It happened so quickly.  He became very ill, and then he was gone.  He had endured such trauma from coming into this world.  It would mean several surgeries, and his being a special needs boy. We had overcome so many things in his little life.  I feel such guilt that I missed something and didn't act sooner or do something to keep him with me a little longer.  The most difficult decision I've ever made was euthanasia.  I contacted someone for in-home services as I did not want him to leave in a state of trauma. I have had, and have loved many animals over my lifetime.  None would come close to the bond that I shared with this wonderful, beautiful creature.  Life is so very empty now.  I listen for his little toenails clicking from room to room.  I miss him getting in the middle of the bed when it was being made, hiding under the covers.  I miss snuggling with him and his waking me up nearly every morning.  Mostly I miss his constant presence and his love.   I struggle with faith, and what happens after we pass.  I cannot imagine a heaven without those we have loved and that would include our precious animal friends.  I pray that Lucky and I will be reunited and he will be healthy and happy to see me again.  I love you my sweet, sweet boy and I miss and think of you every day.  Thank you for loving me back.